I was in a home recently talking with a family.  

 

A group of us had been invited to come and talk with them about more ways that their middle child could be included even more with children from the neighborhood during a specific time. 

 

As the conversation developed I became the listener, the one who watched and learned from everyone in the home.  

 

There were many adults in the room and then children.  

 

I love learning with children as that is where the magic is most of the time.  

 

I learned that the older sibling is fierce, kind, and brave and is always watching out for the other siblings.  This child started to become a part of the conversation and was welcome to share insights of what is needed. 

Pure and delight

Aaaahhh.  The exactness that was brought to the room was pure and delightful. 

This child did this with a confidence that was incredible. 

 

When the chit chat was complete, new ideas were formed and we all left with the beginning next steps in place.  

 

It was then that this oldest brought a thank you forward. 

 

I smiled even bigger as it was presented with a simple gesture.  

The parents were unaware that the gift had been created and yet there was no surprise that it had been put together.  

 

In the bag you see is a treat.  It is the message that makes me pause even now. 

The Gift

Have a good day. 

 

This child had stepped to the side and made one of these for each person who came to their home that day.  What an incredible reminder from a sibling to take a moment and be aware of what others in the family needed. 

 

The gentle crumple of the bag. Letters formed with markers.  Independence, joy and creativity all in one. 

It was awesome.  Indeed, I did have a good day especially after this was my reminder.

 

Since then I have found myself observing siblings. 

Brothers 

One of the great examples of siblings are Brandon and his brothers. They love being, well, brothers.

They always have! 

 

I listen to their trips down memory lane and grin every chance I get. 

 

Now, with three boys growing up it could have meant sibling rivalry.

Not with them.  

 

Tales of riding Big Wheels in the open space of a basement, using Christmas ornaments as baseballs, getting through the chore lists on a long yellow pad before riding dirt bikes through the neighborhood.

 

All the best stories come when brothers talk.

 

These brothers had each other’s backs from the time they were small until now. The youngest brother is no longer with us and yet it feels like he is in the room when talk of his role in a school play or game nights are back in action. 

 

Even now I love that there are long texts that erupt with laughter and sudden exchanges of movie lines with hey, do you remember that time we saw it? 

 

They are there for each  other. A call can come through at any time of the day or night and both Brandon or his brother will respond. 

 

What do you need?  You bet, I am on the way. 

 

Brothers.  Siblings.  Friends.   

No Siblings and yet

Our son did not have siblings and yet it’s like he did have eight. 

What does that mean? 

 

Our siblings became like his siblings.  Like the young child I mentioned, they are all fierce, kind, brave, watchful and would do anything for Dallin. 

 

My six siblings.  Brandon’s two. Eight. 

I pause again here.  

 

Let me start this by saying that they all love being there for anyone, at any time for whatever is needed. 

 

Times this by one thousand and I may be able to get close to what our siblings were willing to do for our son.  

 

Ok.  Here. We. Go. 

From the Start

From the start of the adventure they would do anything at the drop of hat, phone call or sometimes a tilt of the head. 

 

Building replicas of stairs to find strength again, learning new ways to talk with hands and devices, getting homes ready for accessibility, and adding lights to reduce tricky seizures. 

 

Tossing leaves in the air, boating and playing in any water with as many family members as possible.  Jumping on a trampoline for hours and hours. 

 

Painting clouds on ceilings to bring calm.

 

Nicknames from each sibling as life was lived with joy, games and laughter coming at every chance and traditions added to what was in place.  

 

Doors were knocked on for each holiday, birthday and any time a sibling was around to say hello.  Each person came with a new rhythm that brought dance offs, jumping on beds and more laughter. Every time. 

 

Is this what siblings do? 

Doing Whatever

Support. Love. Doing whatever is needed. 

 

Is this what you do with your siblings?  

What level of bravery and gratitude comes with the siblings in your life?  

 

To each one in our life and those all around. For every little and big thing stated and not stated. 

 

Thank you for being brave, for seeing what is needed, then joining in conversations with words and sometimes only with a tilt of the head.

 

Bringing laughter and gentleness and doing it when parents are sometimes unaware. 

Always have and always will. Thank you.

 

May we continue to be there for one another, my friends, even when we are crumpled. 

 

Have a good day.