In the Park

 

Here we go! It’s time to find a light jacket and get ourselves in the park. 

 

There are memories here that I will share with you as you open your closet and choose which one is right for you today. 

 

Do you have the one you want? 

Let’s go together. 

 

Gather the picture of the park in your mind. 

Here are three from the far reaches of mine. 

 

The first is like this one you see here. 

 

Tall trees surrounding a child size playground with climbing equipment and a slide. 

 

Bright colors and a soft-landing zone. 

Have you been in a place like this in the park?

Have you been in a place like this in the park? 

 

I have many times with our son when he was young and learning to walk, climb, then go up and over the fun things in life again. 

 

We could plan a morning appointment with doctors then get to the fun of running around before it was time for lunch. 

 

Snacks could also come in the park if we were with an aunt or uncle or cousins. 

Part of the time would be spent watching other kids play and then learning how to do things just like them. 

 

How many hours were spent in a park like this one? 

Perhaps more than could be counted and yet I have tried to over the years.

 

It may be partly because there is another reason why I knew where the parks were around us those years ago. 

 

Our son needed help going up the stairs and down the slide. Walking on the grass or playing in the soft landing. 

Saying hi to a new child or others who were around.  

There were times in the park that his medical world would need attention.

Then there were times in the park that his medical world would need attention as a seizure would begin and we suddenly found ourselves looking for the soft green grass. 

 

Others were holding hands and leading their children away. 

 

The joy of the day was gone, and we would go home. 

 

 

Would the park wait for another day? Yes.

 

Those the bright colors always called us back and we found that learning to go up and down and on the soft grass was there again. 

 

Other times in the park came later for the two of us. 

 

There were parks full of flowers, benches and paths. 

Walking along to see, hear and feel all the many things to see in the park. 

 

Did you know that a flower can be touched and looked at closely. 

Try it and the next time you will see that one yellow flower has a bright white center. 

 

Another one may have hundreds of black seeds that are eaten by birds at the end of the season. 

 

This is what we found after sitting on benches in the park. 

 

Listening to the bugs, bees and swirling birds came as a bonus to our days. 

The joy of the day could be found in the park.

The joy of the day and looking at every blooming thing could be found in the park. 

 

Then came the next level of meaning as I started going to parks without our son. 

 

It came as quite a surprise. 

 

I loved parks, being in them and with the person who I learned so much from. 

 

It was at a conference that I heard this perspective about parks and, if you stick with me, bears. 

Bears do not usually belong in the park.

Now, I know that bears do not usually belong in the park and yet that is where I found my new perceptions coming. 

 

After my past experiences with joy, fun and even hard moments I was eventually able to hear this from a friend. 

 

Parks can hold things that make us pause. It did that to me when I learned more. 

 

Bears can mean what we have been through, past stuff that might feel like fluff or storms.

 

My friend taught me, through an article from Leigh Merryday that states, “So we rarely leave that park. And we stand—fight or flight response at the ready—clutching the hands of our children all the time. While trying to live our lives in all the necessary ways.”

 

I started thinking then writing more for a national organization in April 2019.

 

‘The bears with Dallin were many. Seizures, fall risk, dementia, muscle wasting, doctor appointments that gave us no new information. 

 

The idea that it’s not that our loads are heavy, it’s that we need to lift more weights to learn to tolerate it. 

I am still not sure what I think about that concept and yet …. I am beginning to understand that it may be that it is through continually gaining additional skills that I will get stronger.’

 

Let’s continue to sit with the bears in the park. 

Resilience has come along with being in the park.

Knowing that resilience has come along with being in the park is what I now know will serve me well. 

 

What else do I know? 

 

This park with the climbing equipment and slides brings a smile and grand memories of a small one learning to walk and communicate with others again. 

Every time, my friends, 

 

Finding joy and doing it all with others around is now the game of the day. 

 

I learned that there were bears coming and yet, I am a mama bear. 

 

The park will continue to bring me joy and time to stay with what I’ve learned from my own grand one. 

Find your resilience and your joy. I’m here with you.